Shaun was the best person that I ever knew... I am grateful I knew him. I was blessed to have the honor to call him my husband. Shaun was always proud of me. He spoke to me with a non-manipulative heart. My husband saw something in me, that I never did. And I have sat for 5 days, wondering what Shaun saw in me that was so spectacular. And I don't mean that in a self-deprecating way, I really don't. I just wondered what he saw. And here is my conclusion - Shaun was capable of looking past me, the yucky, non-perfect, Kristie. He loved me so much, he was able to see what God could see. So here is where my blog thought begins, after a lot of thought.
First of all, this might seem weird - maybe morbid, and for that - I go ahead and apologize, but this is what I feel led to write. I want to talk to you about relationships, and reflect a little. Your words have the power of life and death in an individual. My reference point is my marriage, but I really believe it could be your kids, parents, friends, co-workers, well - anyone. The things that we say and do affect people daily. Shaun would tell me all the time - you can do it! Why do you question yourself? What are you afraid of? You got this!... And that's just to name a few. He was able to see past my flaws and see my potential. This man gave me respect and love like I had never known. I know that there are two people in this world that made me feel amazing. Shaun and God. Two totally different ways, but there is a way that it was the same. Siamese like... if you get my drift. Shaun treated me with such dignity, care, it showed me God's love through him. If he hadn't done that - I don't know how I would have ever been able to walk back into work.
So, try this. Be humble before your loved ones. Work on your relationships. Anything worth having requires work. Did Shaun and I have a perfect relationship? No. Not at all. Was it great? Yes. And why? Because we worked on it. But he took the brunt of the work. I hate that now. But he did. If you want a promotion, you work hard for it. You want to get in a great college? You gotta work hard on it. There are so many things that we gotta work hard on... shouldn't are realtionships be the most important?
Breathe life into your spouses. Your kids. Look at them and realize that the current memory of you could very well be their last. How do you want them to remember you? I am so thankful for mine of Shaun. I'm thankful for the kids memories of him. Should anything ever happen to me, I want people to feel positive towards me. That's something I'm gonna work on. I am gonna practice what I preach. I love you guys. Sorry if this was a rambling, all over the place blog - just a lot in my head.
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