I love shoes. Adore them even - never met a pair I didn't like. But today, a pair of shoes broke my heart. Me and my friend Brooke were searching my house high and low for staples for a staple gun. And we go into the hall closet. Well, after Shaun died - people brought a lot of paper products, and we just began storing them in that closet. So, my sewing box is in there, and I thought, "Hmmm... could I have put them in there?" So I open the closet door. Start moving all the toilet paper, paper towels, etc. to the garage. But then, on the floor of the closet, I find Shaun's red and white tennis shoes. Size 12 boats, that he wore with a red polo and look absolutely gorgeous. And it almost hit me - he's not going to wear those again. He's not coming back home. And I cried and cried. And, also in that closet - I found the Ravens flag that he bought for our new house. I'd looked for it - but didn't know where he had put it because we were planning to move. So, it is now hanging proudly on our front porch.
I can't believe that he is gone. Still I can't. This is the first breakdown like this I have had for awhile. I left the shoes in that exact spot. I can't bear to move them. He was so proud when he bought them. He thought they were his "preppy" tennis shoes... and they were. He was so absolutely amazing. So, a pair of shoes broke my heart - but the man who were them gave me a heart full of love that now is capable of breaking. So, I am thankful to him for that. But, my goodness, I miss him so much.
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